Joy Dare
Monday, February 20
#113  time to rest
#114  parents who value time with me and my family, no matter what we're doing
#115  raspberries and giggles from my baby
#116  my boys' excitement to explore
#117  a gift at breakfast--Mom & Dad coming for the day and my boys' lighting up
#118  a gift at lunch--Isaiah's excitement to have lunch at Grandma and Grandpa's hotel; I love that they are excited and feel like it's such a special treat to do what seem like simple things
#119  a gift at dinner--FREE babysitting by grandparents, so John and I could have a date night at a fun new restaurant :)

Tuesday, February 21
Gifts that are white...
#120  a white shirt covered in sauce means my baby has plenty to eat and enjoys his food
#121  towels to wrap my boys in after bathtime
#122  waterproof mattress covers for this stage of life :)

#123  safe, fun parks to take the boys to so they can play outside

Wednesday, February 22
#124  Vineyard Mothers' Prayer Group--community of amazing women that I get to share life with
#125  parents who my kids know and are known by
#126  phone getting shut off for awhile making me release control of situations

Thursday, February 23
#127  my son's affinity for collecting things from outside--he finds every stick a treasure; it stretches me to slow down and enjoy, but it is challenges me to appreciate these simple treasures as well
#128  my son learning some patience for his baby brother and seeing him extend some grace to him
#129  freedom from the panic I used to experience with sickness for one of my boys and experiencing that freedom fresh when the old tension tries to creep in

Friday, February 24
#130  MY BEAUTIFUL BABY!  He is one year old today!  He stretches me in a lot of ways that I need, and he is an amazing treasure and gift!
#131  being able to take the morning slowly with extra help around with the boys
#132  my son enjoying "projects" to make things or do creative things
#133  grace for my attempts to carefully reconstruct the day's plans to try to keep things calmer and protect the boys and having it sort of flop and be messy
#134  opportunities to release control and embrace the wonderful help of people who love me

Saturday, February 25
#135  being able to put together a fun party for my baby boy
#136  having my "best laid plans" fall apart with naptime, feeling stress build, and then feeling the release and being able to just enjoy the party and embrace whatever would come
#137  quick recovery/healing for my boys so that our whole family could celebrate together today and enjoy the party
#138  loving and supportive friends who come around not only me but also my kids

Sunday, February 26
#139  hard goodbyes reflect the treasured times spent together
#140  my son engaging freely and enthusiastically in children's worship time at the Vineyard
#141  delight on my baby's face when he sees me
#142  being able to celebrate a coming baby with a very dear friend
#143  a hug from my husband after a rough parenting stretch

Joy Dare

Monday, February 6
#79  music class with my son
#80  loads of smiles and giggles from my baby
#81  mother/son "date" to eat ice cream
#82  going to see a movie with John

Tuesday, February 7
gifts that are red
#83  red rain boots handed down through several families
#84  chili enjoyed by all for dinner
#85  red fleece pants keeping my little guy warm as he crawls all around the floor

#86  my son and I working together through trying to be flexible as park plans got shifted by rain
#87  2nd chances
#88  redeemed moments with my boys when I've blown it
#89  brothers giddy from bath splashing together
#90  my son's curiosity about how the world around him works

Wednesday, February 8
#91  my baby's face lighting up and exploding into giggles when he sees me!
#92  the broken lid on my crockpot--I love my crockpot and how it allows me to make dinner for my family while making timing flexible, and I'm so thankful the handle on my lid is hanging in there to make it last!
#93  my husband patiently fixes computer issues for me time after time after time...
#94  reading books to my son that my parents read to me when I was kid
#95  public library--enjoying the thrill of stacks of new books without needing to "own" them


Thursday, February 9
#96  both boys having a fun morning at the park
#97  my son rising to the "big boy" privilege of having a little reading time in bed
#98  my son's delight at the treat of walking to work with Daddy

Friday, February 10
#99  two days at parks this week, which my boys loved
#100  looking down to discover my baby climbing up block stairs at the park--my little adventurer!
#101  our new tradition of "Fort Fridays"
#102  discovering a book Ezekiel loves and made me read a dozen times and laughed every single time!

Saturday, February 11
#103  one on one time with each of my boys today
#104  night out with good food, lovely and quiet little restaurant, wonderful and trusted friends who can share the hard stuff of life, and ice cream!!!
#105  reconnecting with our former neighbor

Sunday, February 12
#106  a working fan
#107  encouragement and challenge from God's Word
#108  the heart, sensitivity, and gift of the worship leader
#109  the reminder of the most amazing gift of all in taking communion
#110  redemption; hard moments in parenting turning around
#111  my husband praying for us
#112  a few moments just to listen

Joy Dare
This week has been a challenge for me with this!  Several things felt like progress last week in having energy and being able to do a few projects I had been wanting to do and with sleep for our little guy.  Then sickness came at the end of the week, and the weekend hit with really disrupted sleep again, and it was a huge weight of discouragement for me!  I have struggled this week and have often been unable to shake a heaviness and a discouragement and just feeling completely exhausted again.
Today I read a post by a high school student from my Dad's hometown.  Her dad was the pastor of one of the churches there where some of my extended family attended.  Yesterday, she and her parents were in a car accident, and neither of her parents survived.  She also has 3 siblings, and they and the community have experienced such a huge loss in such a tragic event!  I read this post she had written, and while she was honest about the pain and the loss and certainly not glib or naive, I was so struck by her heart to thank God for the support she was receiving and for all her parents had given to her life and, mostly, for God Himself for holding her and carrying her through, as she recognized He was the only way she was making it through this experience.  What wisdom beyond her years!
The thing with this Joy Dare is that I started it, not to just feel warm and fuzzy about how blessed my life is but to really breed in my heart and reshape my habits of mind around gratitude and praise for the One who is worthy beyond all circumstance!  Praise is the thing that lifts my eyes from the hard stuff to the One who is actually able to handle the hard stuff!  How quickly I am drawn back into trying to press through it myself when what I really need is to acknowledge that this is beyond my strength but I am loved and known by the Creator of the universe whose strength is made perfect in my weakness.
So, as much as I really struggle to embrace it, today, I am grateful for weakness.  And I will continue to remind my soul to be thankful for weakness until it breathes freely in just enjoying the moments that are gifted to me, no matter how messy they are or how messy I am or feel!  Until I really embrace the reality that I am loved and valued when there is nothing I have done or accomplished that makes that make sense and stop squirming and striving to prove my worth in my "doing."  Until I live receiving and extending true grace.
So, in one sense I have "failed" at the Joy Dare this week, and it was truly feeling like a big fat failure to me.  Yet, in another, this is what the point of it is for me anyway--this transforming of my soul, this softening of my heart, this lifting of my soul to really see my beautiful Lord loving and working in me and the life and moments He has given me.

Given that,
#75  Weakness
#76  Grace
#77  The words of a teenager in the midst of her pain
#78  Being loved unconditionally and being valued simply for being the daughter of the God of all creation

 

Joy Dare
January 23
43.  Rain, washing clean the city air for a time, and the quiet and change of pace it brings for a day
44.  Holy Spirit whispers to be patient, to trust Him for these high energy days when my energy is very low
45.  Dessert out with my husband
46.  Boys laughing together

January 24
47.  Fun play time from the simplest of objects--My son and his buddy had a long and totally delighted play time with dried lentils we had gotten for an art project, throwing them up in the air, using them to "fight bugs," and scooting them all around.
48.  Taking the time to go back into the grocery store to look for a lost toy--I'm learning in very small steps to slow down and go with the moments, and it was a special memory of the adventure of searching for it.
49.  A random concoction put together working out well for dinner
50.  French toast cut in dinosaur shapes making my son's day
51.  Updating my little one's baby book
52.  The dollar bin basket that Isaiah uses to carry around his favorite toys lately

January  25
53.  Everything looks greener, fresher, lighter this morning
54.  Spontaneous dance party with the boys!
55.  Red rain boots of which Isaiah is apparently at least the 4th owner and the freedom to wear them on all the sunny California days just because he wants to

January 26
56.  Learning, little by little, to not always be in a hurry with my boys...just enjoying moments
57.  Sleeping until 6:45 and a glimmer of hope that we're turning a corner on sleep with the baby
58.  Uncontrollable giggles from my son in the back seat at the wind blowing his hair on the highway
59.  Naps
60.  Baby singing--Little Ezekiel has always been a singer, and it is the most wonderful sound!
61.  Isaiah's fascination right now with the story of Jesus' death and resurrection

January 27
62.  My son's little hand clasping mine for comfort as he rests to recover from his fever
63.  God revealing my insecurities of not being enough for my boys and His reassurance that HE is
64.  Winter Dream Tea Latte from a thoughtful friend

January 28
65.  Dinner out with girl friends
66.  Pinterest reminding me of amazing and dear friends who are far away but close to my heart
67.  Letting go for a short break
68.  Talking to my mama
69.  Healing for my son from the fever

January 29
70.  Playdough time
71.  My son pointing out the singing of the birds, which I wasn't even noticing
72.  My baby singing in the bath
73.  Photos and note from friends who live far away but visited this last fall
74.  The sweet little faces of my boys captured in those photos and cemented in my heart for all time!

Joy Dare
January 16
19.  A long uninterrupted nap and shower--I'm learning to accept gifts as unearned acts of generosity.
20.  The delight on my boys' faces when they were delivering chocolates to me--Don't get me wrong, I loved the chocolates, too, but the excitement of my older one to give me a special present, and the adorable grin of the baby while he held (and munched on) two chocolates in a small wrapped package were all the gifts I could have asked for!
21.  A conversation with my husband about totally random interesting things--It seems rare lately that we have (or at least take) the time just to have a conversation that isn't related to our home, parenting, or functioning as a family; it was a refreshing time just to enjoy each other.

January 17
22.  Parenting my boys made me pray.  I am so thankful and so humbled by the opportunity to parent these two amazing gifts, and sometimes I feel fear creep in when it doesn't seem to be going well, and I have to remember over and over and over again that God is greater in their lives than I am.  So I pray.
23.  An unlikely gift, but I'm thankful and laughing at the poop in the potty today!  We hit a stretch where it was being avoided, and today, not only did he go, but he was delighted with himself and proceeded to describe what each piece looked like!
24.  We are starting a series as a whole congregation around the book Emotionally Healthy Spirituality.  I have only finished the first chapter so far, but it draws me back again to this journey that God is pressing me on to let Him transform the deep parts of me and not just try to manage and control and clean up the surface.

January 18
25. 2 Corinthians 12:9  It seems to be the verse I am wrapping my heart and soul around in this season to truly believe and walk in faith that "His grace is sufficient" and that His strength is made perfect in weakness!
26.  Jesus shares the two greatest commandments...LOVE!  Love Him.  Love others.  I want to center my life and family and my home around this!!!  So simple and yet so challenging!
27.  Bible stories with my son at night--I am thankful for the chance to share these with my little boy and that he looks forward to them and asks about them and engages them, and I trust God's promise that His word will not return void.

January 19
28. I had been starting to not feel very well, and I woke up in the middle of the night during one of the baby's rough stretches feeling really, really awful.  I thought about the next morning and had the hope that maybe my husband could take half a day off of work so that I could go in to see the doctor.  A major struggle for me that God is really pressing me on is to admit I need help and to accept it.  The next morning before I said anything, John suggested taking a half day off so that he could take Isaiah to the museum, which Isaiah had been so looking forward to.  In spite of that huge blessing, I still had to fight the impulse in myself to say no and suggest that I just figure out a way to handle the day, but thankfully, I accepted.  It was so needed and such a blessing that I nearly missed, but I am so thankful for the little steps of walking more fully in God's grace for me!
29.  Time to just sit and smile with my baby
30.  A slow, unrushed walk with my boys, noticing leaves and signs and flowers and grass and tree bark and little gifts in our little urban corner.

January 20
31.  My son's excitement to be able to pick out library books and the pleasure of watching him get engrossed in "reading" them
32.  Ice cream treats
33.  A sweet and trusted babysitter for the boys who loves on them and navigates even tricky times gracefully

January 21
34.  My boys' affection for each other
35.  My baby's delight at faces and people
36.  The fabric store--It is fun to choose the pieces for a project for my son with him, but it also reminds me of the many times of carefully choosing patterns and fabric, a treasured outing with my mama at least once a year as she patiently taught me to sew.
37.  Discovering a video, as I sorted through last year's, of my son holding my baby on his first day home

January 22
38.  Loving parents who delight in being involved in my children's lives and invest so much to do that across the distance
39.  Quiet home tonight
40.  My son's enthusiasm about meals lately:  "This is a yummy, yummy meal, Mom!"
41.  Blogs of many amazing women that I've discovered lately that inspire, encourage, and speak truth
42.  Sitting quietly together with John, both reading

Joy Dare

JOY DARE 2012 (see page for explanation)

January 10
1. Sweets in general--With nursing my baby, I've had such a craving for sweets, and I feel really struck in thinking of something sweet today what a luxury it is to have desserts at all, and I'm thankful for being able to ENJOY food!  Sweets speak to me of "extra," of abundance.
2.  Being able to feed my children healthy food and having plenty of food to feed them.
3.  Comfort Food--As I ate my poached egg and toast, I thought of the many times my mom would make me soft-boiled eggs and toast when I was sick, and I'm thankful to have been loved and nurtured as a child and that certain foods still trigger that feeling for me.

January 11
4.  The color yellow itself gives me joy because it is my son's favorite color, and he gets excited about seeing things in his favorite color.
5.  My boys and this yellow laptop--It has often seemed on its last leg, but this computer is still hanging in there for us, and both boys have always been drawn to play with it.  Seeing my baby stretching over the edge of the couch to reach the laptop or bang with his screaming, grunting delight is a little treat in my day.
6.  Stomp rocket--My parents bought a little rocket launcher for Isaiah that you hit with your foot to launch the foam rockets.  Isaiah has gotten such delight out of it, and when he took it to the playground, it became this sweet vehicle for him to engage other kids in a newly bold way that was very special to him, really fun for them all, and a really treasured moment for me to stand back and watch.

January 12
7.  Deciduous tree leaves--Isaiah recently learned the word "deciduous" from Sesame Street, so it has been drawing his, and therefore my, attention to all the leaves above us in the trees.  I am always struck by the variety in them!  But, with the focus on "deciduous," I am also struck by the amazing process of making all things new, even through paths that seem bare and dead!
8. Our bedroom floor--It is just beautiful to me and feels like such a treat to have been able to put it in.  I'm really enjoying having laminate on most of the floors in our new-ish home, actually.
9.  My son's sweet face inches from mine, joining in singing a bedtime song, "From the Rising of the Sun."

January 13
10.  My baby's laugh--When someone makes a raspberry noise, he just giggles with total delight, and it is most adorable and infectious sound!
11. "Mommy...Mommy...Mommy"--It seems like it comes out of my toddler's mouth several hundred times a day, and sometimes it stretches my patience, but I am remembering how thankful I am to be able to be here, home full-time with him to hear all of those and that he loves and trusts me to call on me all throughout the moments of his day.
12.  The turn of the key when my husband is arriving home from work!

January 14
13.  A visit from a friend I rarely see who is just a treat to be around
14.  Having two boys who eat well and having plenty of good food to feed them.  Also really thankful for experiencing some grace in not always having the "ideal" meals that I'd like to have prepared for them!  I have struggled with being really hard on myself about this, but my husband and my boys flow with my shortcomings in energy in this area during this season really graciously, and it has been a very obvious area of life that I have had to yield and release the weight of my own expectations.  Still struggle often but thankful for experiencing grace here.
15.  As I pass on some baby hand-me-downs to my friend, I am reminded of how generously and graciously we have been provided for in the things we have needed (and way beyond actual needs!) for our boys!

January 15
16.  Hearing "Daddy, I'm doing it!" as my son delighted in helping Daddy with the task of trimming ivy from the patio.  He so delights in pleasing us!
17.  After a discouraging discipline interaction, my son crawled in my lap during bedtime songs.  I am so grateful that God is bigger in my boys' lives than even my greatest strengths of parenting but especially that His strength is made perfect in my weakness!  Learning to connect to this truth!
18. My pajama pants--They are so soft, and they are part of a gift from my sweet mom that represents a tradition passed down for generations.

Saving Bath Time

Isaiah has been hating the bath lately. I mean, total melt-down, everyone's miserable, really hating it! It's weird because he used to love the bath, so I'm not sure what happened, but I was determined to do something! (Side note: We had already tried a lot of stuff hoping to return bath time to the happy days gone by!)

I had seen directions for making your own bath crayons in Super Baby Food that I had wanted to try. I thought maybe Isaiah would enjoy helping to make them, plus they wouldn't have all that junk I can't even pronounce like the ones you buy in the store. So, we gave it a try. Isaiah was super excited about the idea and couldn't wait to do it once I told him.
Basically, you use soap flakes or grate mild bar soap. I didn't know where to find soap flakes, so we grated bars of Ivory soap. The directions say to add one tablespoon of hot water slowly to 1/4 cup of soap flakes. It was hard to stir, so I stirred while Isaiah put in the water and food coloring. Asking a toddler to pour something in slowly is a little worthless, but he was enjoying our project. We put it into sections of an ice cube tray and let it dry. At some point a couple days later we popped it out to let the bottom dry better as well.
Isaiah told everyone who came over about our bath crayons and showed them off. As you can see from the picture, they weren't pretty! Unfortunately, their function was about as poor as they look. They were fun to try but not very effective at writing/drawing in the bath. Maybe more food coloring next time? They get slimy pretty quickly, too.

So, the bath crayons were not terribly successful, and I still have a ziploc bag of grated soap, but the experience was fun, and Isaiah actually got excited about bath time to use them. It didn't entirely save bath time, though, and the funny random thing that seems to have come to the rescue, at least for now, is a song I pulled out on a whim from Sesame Street. In the Puddle Jumping episode open, Baby Bear sings a song about singing in the shower. I have been married long enough to a man who makes up songs or changes the words constantly, so I made a little spontaneous adaptation for the bath, and he thought it was the greatest thing on the planet. So far, all we have to do if the fussing starts is start to sing the song, and we're golden!

Also, Isaiah has grown resistant to veggies at times, but he asked for thirds the other night because of the Veggies Revolt episode and kept going, "Crunch. Healthy." I have to admit that I am less than thrilled about Isaiah watching much TV, but I have to admit Sesame Street has come through for us lately! Thanks, PBS!